Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Slogging towards Easter

I went to noon Eucharist today, led the choir, sang a solo verse and descant...and now I'm resting on the couch at home. It seems like I can only do things in 90 minute chunks, and then I've got to seriously rest. So be it.

Easter is coming up so fast, and there is much to do between now and then, and I may not get much of it done. I'm trying to be at peace with that, but have very mixed feelings.

Someone sent me an e-mail talking about God's power of healing, which of course I believe in and have witnessed, and in the email they talked about a young woman cured of ovarian cancer, who had participated at some prayer services, then passed the tumors like grapes from her body. It reminds me too much, I think, of some of the televangelists who used to pretend to cure cancer by seemingly pulling what turned out to be chicken guts from the body of sick person. In that case, it was all about power and money, and not much about the Lord.

I do believe in God's healing power. I've seen it in my own life, for which I am exceedingly grateful. I've seen it in my children, a couple of whom seemed to be on a downward spiral but have come to a place of peace and healing. I've seen it in the baby who was born with many congenital defects and who was not expected to live, but who is now a year old and as perky as can be.But I wonder about the motives of those who promoted themselves in the story. And if this woman was healed, why not my dear friend M, a devout and faithful Christian who died this past summer, too young, of pancreatic cancer? And why not little Meg, an angel who died of multiple systems failure before she could get a liver transplant at 9 months of age? We prayed long and hard for both of them...and they died. And I'm at peace with that, because I know they are at the heavenly banquet table. But I have a hard time with an approach that says that one kind of praying brings miracles, and if the miracle doesn't occur, you weren't part of the right prayer team.

So am I condemned to damnation? Or am I just on too many different medications?

1 comment:

Lorraine said...

On too many different medications I think. =)

But, I've had those same thoughts, about why some are cured and others are not. One of my best friends had a little boy who died at age six from a brain tumor after four years of surgery, chemo, radiation, you name it. That child had people around the world praying for him, in several different faiths (his dad works for the World Bank). Yet he died.

That is the implication, I think -- what you said about the "right" kind of prayer. I mean, the implication among some people. If someone is not cured/healed then the prayer wasn't "right".

But -- during my year as chaplain at the hospital here I began to see a difference between "heal" and "cure". I had never reflected on this before. But we can pray for healing, and mean the healing of relationships, the bringing of peace to the person, etc. Problem is that family members who hear us pray for "healing for Uncle Bob" will usually hear that as "please cure Uncle Bob's cancer". So I was always reluctant to use either word.

Well, sorry, didn't mean to hijack your blog. :) I haven't come to any real resolution on this, although I still find myself drawn to chaplaincy. I usually ended up praying for strength and peace for the family, and wisdom for the doctors.

Anyway, I hope the cat therapy is continuing, and continuing prayers for you. (for strength and peace... :) )