Post-Christmas Recovery

I spent the day running errands, replenishing the refrigerator (a natural result of having two 20-something young men over for a few days), doing laundry, straightening up. I should be doing my Hebrew homework, since I doubt I'll have time to do it in the Middle East, and I should be doing more preliminary reading for the trip, but it seems like the thing I need to do most is to chill out. It was great having Litigator and StoneMason here (StrongOpinions is still here, since she'll be going with us on the trip.)

My sister-in-law called to give me some logistics. Only one carry-on bag, not to exceed 56 cm x 45 cm x 35 cm. No separate purse (it will need to fit into the carry-on, along with my meds and laptop and book and knitting and make-up). Guess I'm going to have to figure out how to travel a bit lighter than my norm. Of course, it's never clothes, it's always books and such.

I'm sleeping a lot, another natural result of holidays and family and such. I should be working out a lot, given my eating habits over the past week, but I won't worry about it. Yet.

Why Mothers Have Gray Hair

The airborne figure is StoneMason, doing what he loves best, competing on his snowboard.

NEWS FLASH!

Just found out that Princess Granddaughter is going to be a Big Sister. Her little brother or sister will arrive late in July, and will bring my grandkid count up to four. Since Princess Granddaughter is approaching five years old, I had doubted whether they'd have another one, but I guess they need another child to use some of the eight zillion toys PG has or has outgrown...(giggling madly, since I'm responsible for a bunch of them).

Ever so much more fun to talk about than NT exams!

Home Stretch

Survived the Hebrew mid-term today. Survived the Liturgics final and the Old Testament mid-term yesterday. Survived the Church Music take-home final last week. Only the New testament final awaits. Tomorrow morning. All Paul, all the time. Since we have yet to receive ANY of our written work back from this prof - didn't get our mid-term back either - we are all shooting in the dark in rpeparing for this examination. If I didn't love his lectures so much, I'd really be ticked.

I've worked with a wonderful study group on this material, but I still feel somewhat lost on preparing for it. The possible essay questions are so broad-ranging I hardly know where to begin. Oh, well, in another day it will all be past me, and then I'll be on to the next thing.

On a less stressful note, I've got all the gifts wrapped except for the hom-knit ones, and I'll get the last of them done within 48 hours (Litigator's skullcap). I think I am ready for a rest.

Then again, the Hebrew prof gave us homework...

Global Warming, or at least Local Warming

It will be in the mid-70's today in Your Nation's Capital. About 30 degrees higher than normal. My pocketbook likes it - lower heating bill - but my daffodil bulbs are way confused and all my non-winter clothes are stored away. Mebbe I should go naked....

No.

Never mind.

Bad idea.

It would scare horses and small children.

Back to studying...

My weekend with no one (well, not quite)...

Done this weekend:

1) outlined Genesis and Exodus in preparation for the OT exam. Still working on Leviticus. How much of it have I retained? I haven't a clue.

2) reviewed 500 Hebrew words, 5 different conjugations or paradigms, rules for all sorts of Hebrew grammar. How much of it have I retained? I haven't a clue.

3) did an analysis of Romans for my NT study group and organized and shared my class notes with my fellow students. How much of it have I retained? I haven't a clue.

4) organized all my materials for my open-book liturgics exam (I'll re-read the key articles tomorrow night). How much of it have I retained? I haven't a clue.

5) noted with sadness the decision by several Episcopal churches in my diocese to leave ECUSA to become part of the Church of Nigeria. Does this mean the end of ECUSA? Hardly. Does this mean the end of the debate? Hardly, but dialogue is better than picking up one's marbles and walking away. Jesus weeps.

6) started my new icon - turns out I'll be doing Saint Matthew, since I couldn't find a model icon for Sophia that spoke to me. It was soothing to pray and work on this project, although I won't put my hands on it again until mid-February after my research trip to the Persian Gulf, diocesan council and class retreat. I'll miss working on it. I had hoped my Saint Peter would be back - my teacher is varnishing it now - but he wasn't quite ready yet. I'll see him when I get back from my travels.

7) finished the first Woodsman Sock for StoneMason, and am periodically taking a break from studying to knit Sock Number Two, which I expect will be done in a day or two. Feels good to do something tactile and finite. I'm going to try and get a skullcap done for Litigator by Christmas...it'll be tight. I'd like to give something knitted to each kid (made a shawl/scarf thing for StrongOpinions already).

8) did four loads of laundry. How do we get so many things dirty in the course of a week?

9) went to a former Senior Warden's party. Good to be with friends, but the introvert in me can only take so much of that before I want to go for a walk in the woods, or take a nap.

10) visited a potential Field Ed site that I really liked. I'll talk with the vicar again at diocesan council.

Our OT professor, noting our jumpiness last week, said, "You know, you wouldn't be here if God didn't want you to be here, and God will help you. You know more than you think you do. Trust the Spirit." Wise words. I need to keep saying them to myself at least 2000 more times until Thursday noon, when the exams are done.

PH has been a prince, cooking for me. I am blessed!

I covet your prayers for this coming week, for focus, calm, and good memory.

Coming Up For Air One of These Days

I sang as soprano soloist at another Messiah last night, this one at the home parish. I'm hip deep in finishing the semester. Last session of the Liturgical Music class this evening, along with prep for the online exam. The Hebrew prof is driving us full throttle so we get through Chapter 15 before the final (gack). Piel verb forms. We finished the Pauline corpus in NT, and tomorrow we tackle more OT (scary looking forward toward THAT test). Last Liturgics class and practicum tomorrow (another exam that fills me with dread). Plus I've got to work on the study notes for my study group on Romans. Seems I'm the only one in the group who actually read the book that the prof assigned for Romans...

So I got back a small paper - one-pager - from the OT prof, who felt I should have gone deeper, and gave me a 3 out of 5. Gee whiz, how deep can you go on a one-page paper? 'Twas a small comfort that the others in the class also got 3's. The next paper for her is due tomorrow. Suffice to say it is three pages.

Five exams await, two online. I know I will survive, but it will be a busy week and a half. Plus I'm interviewing for a CPE placement on Wednesday. Plus I've been visiting different churches every Sunday scoping out potential Field ed placements for next year.

I think I need chocolate.

Or Valium.

At least I got my icon of Saint Peter done on Saturday. If Irena gets it varnished for me by next week, I'll take a picture and post it for you. He came out better than I thought he would. Saint Matthew will be next.

Knitting when I've got a moment here or there. Another pair of socks (probably for strong Opinions) will be done by tomorrow; then I'll start a pair of heavyweight socks for Stonemason, who's working this winter on chimney repairs in the North Country.

Maybe Thorazine.

Or sleep.

Whatcha think?

Ah, Saturday Night!

We did reasonably well at our Seminary Choir Messiah sing-along last night. It was a full house in the chapel. My singing of the soprano solos was well-received. Given that the other soloists were our choir director ( a tenor with an international reputation in his younger days as a specialist in early music) and two young people with vocal performance degrees from two of the best conservatories in the country, I was grateful to have not embarrassed myself. It was somewhat disconcerting to look up and see several of my professors in the audience. . .

Today was a whirlwind of various and sundry errands, but I got to icon-writing in the midst of it. St. Peter is two or three weeks away from being done. I'll post a pic of him when he's finished. I'd like to get him done before I go to the Middle East for January term and my independent study project. I'm trying to decide which icon I'll do next. I'd like to do a St Paul, but I'm also intrigued by the possibility of doing a Sophia. We shall see.

I was pleased to finish phase two of my NT exegesis paper. This part was word study. I was grateful to have studied Greek before getting to seminary - it made the research much more understandable. it was supposed to be five pages, but I barely kept the text of the paper to eight. It actually was something of a gas to do. Am tunring into an exegesis geek?

I'm up ten pounds since I started seminary, whch is annoying. It's mostly due to a lack of exercise. I'm lucky to get seven hours of sleep, much less add in 30-40 minutes of exercise. I suppose I should make the time. I'm not able to get all of the reams of reading assignments done (I'm not alone amongst my classmates in that regard) so it feels strange to be thinking of trying to fit exercise in as well.

I got brave and went to Costco for some household odds'n'ends, plus winter socks for StrongOpinions out in the cold and snow of Colorado, and gifts for the grandbabies. The crowds were not too bad, and I got out without buying anything stupid or ridiculously self-indulgent. I even got StrongOpinions' package mailed (including rolls of quarters for the laundromat - why she can't get to the bank herself, I don't know, but that aspect of living on her own hasn't quite settled yet).

Short ribs are braising on the stove, and I'm just about ready to crash for the night. Tomorrow I'll go check out another possible field ed site, and in the evening go to a showing of "The Ten Commandments." Believe it or not, it's an assignment for my OT class...

...and maybe somewhere in there, my dear usband and I will get to actually sit and talk to each other. What a concept!

Knitting Again - Yay!

Having finished the shawl/scarf for StrongOpinions while in Windy City, I have started a pair of socks. Feels good to be knitting again...I just have a couple of papers to complete this week that may interrupt the knitting fiesta. Dang!

Windy City Adventures

Thanksgiving. Wow.

Way too much food, especially of the carb-laden variety. My mother-in-law made the food extravanganza yesterday, while some of my generation and some of the littler ones went downtown to watch the parade. The Lawn Chair Dads precision lawn-chair drill team was the high point. They wore red union suits with sleeveless t-shirts and print boxer shorts over them, furry arctic bomber hats with earflaps, and black socks and sandals. Truly a sight to behold. We kept ourselves warm with a thermos of coffee for adults and of hot chocolate for the kids. I was surprised by the number of vendors giving out freebies (Naked Juice, for example, and free porta-potties with 7-11 logos plastered all over them!) Great fun, and not overly cold for Windy City on Thanksgiving.

I should have gone out walking each morning, but didn't. The jeans are definitely feeling snug.

I've got a pot of turkey wild rice vegetable soup on the stove, to get the last bits of flavor out of the carcass, and to give us something a little lighter on the digestive system for supper. There's also a butternut squash soup in the works. My veterinarian brother-in-law (a man of many talents) has a pumpkin cheesecake in the oven.

We went down to the great big art museum today. No icons per se, but some early Italian religious images in tempera on board that clearly were influenced by them. I successfully avoided buying stuff in the museum store. I did fall victim to a great buy on a Norwegian sweater in the store for all things Swedish. Here's the advantage to being short - you can fit into kid's size clothes sometimes. And a kid's Norwegian sweater is one-third the price of a grown-up one. And I never knit something for myself - I only knit for others, so I have to buy for myself (poor me!).

Speaking of knitting, I'm slowly getting back into it. Hadn't knit a thing since August when I started seminary. But StrongOpinions had asked for a combination shawl/scarf thing, and I saw some great bulky yarn, so I whipped that off. I should get back into gear on my sister-in-law's Norse sweater (it's about 1/2 done). I had planned to give it to her for this Christmas, but I'm afraid she'll get it next Christmas. Ah, well. It feels good to be knitting again, though.

Tomorrow we'll get up, have a bite, and head to the airport and back home to Your Nation's Capital. It's good to be with family, but it's also good to be home.

So where are you?

News update on break-ups, mess-ups, and speak-ups

On the breakup of StrongOpinions and Semi-Useless Boyfriend:
I was worried about my girl, so I cashed in some frequent flyer miles, went out to Buddhist University last weekend and made sure she was eating and such. I took her out to eat a couple of times, made a batch of vegetarian chili and put it in the freezer, adn took her for some retail therapy. she seems to be doing better. SUB called last week, though, and wanted to get back together. SO is appropriately skeptical. I'm hoping she decides it's over once and for all, but mothers can't push about such things. She can do better, though.

On the Congress:
No sooner did Nancy Pelosi ascend to the Speakership than she tripped over her (very chic) Armani pantsuit and backed Jack Murtha for her second in command. The predictable result was that he lost, and her former rival, Steny Hoyer, won. An embarrassment, since she expended much political capital trying to get her candidate the job. She should have done better, but I'm still hoping she can do better.

On ECUSA:
Our new Presiding Bishop, Katharine, sent a very crisp letter (http://www.episcopalchurch.org/3577_79844_ENG_HTM.htm) to a bishop who, unhappy about the past 30+ years of ECUSA's decisions, was threatening to pull his whole diocese out of the church. It was the letter I was hoping someone, somehow, someday would write. Finally! She has done better, and I'm proud. You go, girl!

On school:
I am busily writing, and reading, and translating, and memorizing. I'm trying to NOT feel guilty about going to PH's family in the Windy City for Thanksgiving. Rationally I know I cannot get it all done, even if I stay home chained to the books and the computer, but irrationally, I worry. (mumbling to myself: "all will be well, all will be well...")

I will do better at managing my own expectations of myself.

Eventually.

(And you blog-lurkers, c'mon and check in with me. I love to know you're there reading my pithy prose.)

Gray Day

It's wet, the leaves are mostly on the ground, and I'm tired.

StrongOpinions and Semi-Useless Boyfriend broke up yesterday (his idea), and I've been fielding calls from far away from her as she deals with the pain. She called last night at 2:30 am. I am not at my best at 2:30 am (who is?) so I tried to comfort her and get her to sleep. More similar calls during school today. It's so hard when you lose your first love.

I managed to stay awake in classes today. Barely. I hope I'll get a full night's sleep tonight.

I'm feeling swamped by the amount of reading the profs are expecting this semester, but I think I'll survive. The good news is that Hebrew is such a gas that I end up doing more work than required since it's so amazing.

The other good news was the changeover in the House of Representatives - I'm not fond of one-party government. The bad news was the passage of a marriage bill in our state - marriage defined as one man and one woman - that seems to be legislation at its worst. It's mean-spirited, it has a number of unintended consequences not only for gay couples but for straight couples who are not married, and it does nothing to help the body politic.

Don't these folks have more important things to worry about?

Meanwhile, our bishop left this hospital this morning - they thought he might have had a little stroke, but he is doing fine. He doesn't have an easy job, and he does it with grace. I'm hoping this was just a blip on the radar screen.

I had to take the car to the body shop this afternoon after school. It was parked on the street in front of our house, and someone backed into the side of it and scraped the whole driver's side. It goes without saying that the guilty party didn't leave a note on my car. $1725 worth of damage. Thank goodness for insurance.

Yes, I know the good news items outnumber the bad news items. It's still a cold rainy gray day, though. Now if the Secretary of State of the Commonwealth would just certify that Jim Webb has beaten George Allen, I think I'd feel like the sun has come out.

The Investiture and Seating, and Why I Don't Like Liturgical Dance

On Saturday, I watched the investiture of our new Presiding Bishop, the incomparable Katharine Jefferts Schori, on my computer. We were supposed to watch it at Big Old Seminary on a big screen, but the technology failed us. That's fine, because my house is only five minutes away, and the service was two hours long. You can check it out here if you'd like:
http://www.episcopalchurch.org/investiture/

It was marvelous. Amazing music across many different cultures (you haven't lived until you've seen a couple hundred bishops - mostly WASP - in chimeres and rochets and all that, bopping to Siyahamba), beautiful liturgy, great sermon.

And then there were the liturgical dancers. I am admittedly a curmudgeon, but I just don't get a bunch of people running around whipping pieces of cloth in the air. None of these folks were Baryshnikov or Twyla Tharp by any stretch of the imagination. It all seems a bit forced to me. Maybe the more visually oriented people can explain what I'm missing, but it seems too 70s for words. I lived in the 70s the first time around, and it wasn't any more attractive then.

I could have done with something with a bit more gravitas than the tie-dyed look vestments (I'm turning intoPeaceBang) but other than that, it was wonderful. Very moving, and the sermon was powerful.

Then on Sunday, I went down to the Cathedral for her seating and Eucharist. Several fellow seminarians were part of it, and a number of us were among the congregation. Another amazing event, with many of the same features as the investiture (including the dancers, darnit) - it was great to see and feel it from another angle. Many of us were moved to tears by the import of it. Who'd have thought even 20 years ago that we'd see this moment?

God grant her strength for the time to come. It won't be easy.

Both ends of the spectrum

I got back my Hebrew final...

(drum roll, please)

97.7

Now you know exactly how geeky the prof is, that I ended up with a grade like that.

I got an A for the semester, since we started in August term. glad; it was hard work, and i loved it. Still, I'm taking the second semester pass-fail, since it will only get crazier.

I did my Liturgics mid-term. Sixteen questions, multiple choice, open book. A half-hour to take it.

Piece of cake, right?

Not.

Only two questions referenced what was covered in the lectures. The rest were obscure factoids from the readings, and we're talking obscure here, not the main themes.

My grade? 75. And I was grateful to get that, given what some of my classmates got.

This was a lesson in humility. Also in not getting too wrapped up in the grade thing. It's about the skills and about grace, and not about a number. I need reminding of that on a regular basis.

As for the other exams and papers, none have yet been returned. Another lesson: patience. Drat.

PH is off at a conference this weekend, so the cats and I are alone in the house. I have gotten a few movies from Blockbuster, and I intend to do studying/reading/homework and videowatching. Tomorrow at 11 I'll join a bunch of fellow seminarians in one of our auditoriums to watch the investiture of our new Presiding Bishop, Katharine Jefferts Schori. Sunday, a number of us will go to the Washington National Cathedral for her seating. I am thrilled!

RevGals Friday Five: Toofies

Friday Five: Toofies

Please share your thoughts on the following:

1) The Tooth Fairy
I got quarters, too. My kids got a buck a tooth. now I hear that some little ones around here get a fiver per tooth. Seems a bit high to me - does that make me a curmudgeon?

2) Flossing
I don't like to floss, but I do love my little steel curved toothpick that does the same thing, only better. I use an electric toothbrush that's supposed to stimulate my gums.

3) Toothpaste Brands
StrongOpinions, being Miss organic, uses Tom's of Maine. I like plain old garden variety Colgate.

4) Orthodontia for Adults
If you need 'em, get 'em. Lots of folks (like RM's friend) come from families that didn't have the resources when they were kids. Go for it. PH, who grew up a missionary kid in Africa, dodged the bullet, but others he knew didn't. Since they were home on itineration for a year, all orthodontic work had to be completed in that timeframe. It was a painful thing, getting what took the rest of us three or four years all done in one. Poor things. I wonder if they would have preferred to have waited until they got home for college.

5) Whitening products
They often make the teeth look unnaturally white. Seems a bit much for me, but I think we've already established that I'm a curmudgeon.

RevGals Ghoulish Friday Five

1. Do you enjoy a good fright?
No. I've had some bad stuff happen to me that make me less than enthralled by scary happenings, because sometimes it's not a game.

2. Scariest movie you've ever seen
I'm with RM - "Silence of the Lambs" tops my scary movie list. When I was a teen, "The Exorcist" was way up there on the scare list. For some strange reason, an old movie called "Soylent Green" scared the *** out of me when I was in college, but who knows why.

3. Bobbing for apples: choose one and discuss: a) Nothing scary about that! Good wholesome fun. b) Are you *kidding* me?!? The germs, the germs!
I don't find it scary. I don't worry about the germs. However, as someone with temperature sensitive teeth, I have been unpleasantly surprised when my mouth hit the water once or twice in the past. Yeeoow!

4. Real-life phobia
Having to walk in a dark place at night in a less-than-savory neighborhood. See #1 above. Something similarly scary happened to StrongOpinions last week, and we're still both a bit freaked out by it.

5. Favorite "ghost story"
The opera DonGiovanni, and the ghost of the Commendatore. If you've got to have someone scary, make him a good singer. Second best: "Hamlet." What can I say? If it's in iambic pentameter, it can't be all THAT scary!

Prayers, Please-

...for dear L. She had become engaged to a wonderful man (after a number of years as a single mother) and was looking forward to the wedding in a few months.

Her fiancee was found dead of a heart attack two days ago.

Give rest, O Christ, to thy servant W. with thy saints, where sorrow and pain are no more, neither sighing but life everlasting.

Sometimes God gives us gifts that last a lifetime, like a slow-burning candle. Sometimes God gives us gifts that are like a meteor shower, exploding with beauty, but so very transitory. Who is to say which is the greater gift? We can only thank God for His gifts, even as we grieve their transitory nature.

Almighty God, Father of mercies and giver of all confort: deal graciously, we pray thee, with all those who mourn, that casting every care on thee, they may know the consolation of thy love; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

We love you, L. We loved W. for loving you, and we grieve with you.

No Rest for the Weary

...not when there are two cats in the house.

I was up early this morning, getting ready for a field trip to a funeral home. I was just getting dressed when I heard a mighty crash from downstairs. I went downstairs and the two cats were in the kitchen, looking nervous. A marble cheese board which normally resides on the counter was on the floor, broken in two. I suspect one or the other of them tried to jump up on the counter onto it, and it slipped off and broke. In thinking of the expressions on the cats' faces, I'm reminded of the first words my dear husband learned as a second-grader in Belgium many years ago: "Ce n'etait pas moi." The cats always speak French when they do something bad; they think it makes them seem less guilty and more charmant...

Then it was off to the farmer's market for beautiful apples, then to the funeral home, and now I'm hip-deep in Hebrew and Liturgics et al for my exams next week. Later I've got a rehearsal for a concert I'm singing in tomorrow, a fundraiser for a homeless ministry here in Your Nation's Capitol, and a dinner part tonight. I'm trying not to feel guilty about the time spent away from studying. It will be what it will be.

Word for the Day: Hesychasm

So a goodly part of the day was spent doing abstracts of previous lectures for my New Testament study group. Reading, analyzing, winnowing out the important factoids and themes. It's necessary work (our mid-terms are next week) but it's not the most rewarding stuff in the world.

I took a break to go to Evensong at 5:30. It was a wonderful and peaceful end to a rainy, cool day. I love the quiet. I love the singing. I love the meditation on Scripture (great reading from Jeremiah tonight). I love the incense. It's an opportunity to take the time to go deep into prayer, which is often very difficult to do. Mostly I love the darkness in the chapel (this service is lit by four candles and just a bit of light over our psalters) and the quiet.

After evensong, I came back home, finished up the fifth lecture write-up, and cooked dinner. I had grand plans for studying Hebrew, but I was too tired, so I went upstairs with my big book on icons, to research an icon of unknown provenance in the seminary's Oratory. I got what I needed (it's a Harrowing of Hell, probably a copy of something from early Moscow school), but I got lost in the wonderful book, reading and remembering why I love icons so much.

And I found out about hesychasts, who spent their life in silence so they could meditate and pray. They may have used repetition of the Jesus Prayer as a meditative tool. It's an ascetic practice from the 3rd C, noted by Chrysostom and the Sayings of the Desert Fathers.

It also informs the work of some of the early icon writers. Some of the proponents of the practice were the subjects of icons as well.

The thought of quiet and a disciplined meditative practice seems very appealing right now, although I doubt I could sustain it for the long haul. Maybe just an evensong's worth of hesychasm...

Sex Ed For Clergy

One of the requirements in this diocese for all clergy, seminarians, and paid staff in parishes is that they take two sexual abuse/misconduct prevention classes, one targeted at protecting children, one dealing with issues for and about adults. I spent my Thursday at the Adult class.

I wanted to take a shower when I came home.

I understand the importance of this training, and I buy into the ways we need to prevent such bad acts and protect ourselves as clergy.

I just wish this was a different world, and we didn't have to think about it. One of my seminary classmates was there with me, and she and I were disturbed to see that one description of bad acting sounded frighteningly like some behavior we've observed in one of our classmates, who has, as they say, "issues." The surprising thing in both of our minds is how we thought our rigorous "process of discernment" was supposed to take folks like that off the front burner until they had worked through those issues. I guess it doesn't always work that way. Dang.

I came home to wonderful, delightfully sane PH, who doesn't have any issues (or any issues he has complement mine delightfully). We went out for an anniversary dinner that we could ill afford, but life is short and we both were ready for a treat. It cleaned away that icky feeling I'd had all day in the class. Life is good.

I'm past my whine-fest of the other day - thanks for understanding.