When
my children were little – I raised five children, so that seemed like a very
long season indeed – we had a system of sharing the chores. Most large families
have them. Ours was called The Chore List and it included taking out the
garbage, loading or emptying the dishwasher, walking or feeding the dog – you get
the idea. There’s never enough time to get everything done around the house,
and sharing the work makes it possible to keep the chaos at bay. It’s also a
great way to teach children how to do the things that need to get done…at least
in theory.
I
say that, because the reality was that every time I had to enforce the Chore
List, one of the children said “Why do I have to do it? Sam did a bad
job of it last time, so now I’ve got twice as much work to do.” Or “Why do I
have to do it? Allie didn’t have to do it last week when she was sick, and I’ve
got a headache.”
I tell you this, because in
our gospel this morning, we’re missing a key part of the story – the question
that Judas (NOT Iscariot) asks Jesus that prompts our gospel passage. He says “Lord,
how is I that you will reveal yourself to us, and not to the world?”
And
that begs the question of why Judas asks this question…it’s because Jesus has
just said, “I’m out of here. I’ll be supporting you, through the Holy Spirit,
but now it’s your responsibility to share the truth and the way.” No wonder
Judas asks his question! Even though it is couched in more formal language than
we or our children would use, Judas is saying “Why do we have to do it?”
And
the unspoken words behind that “why do we have to it” are “it’s hard, and we
don’t want to have to do it.”
Sort
of like my kids and emptying the dishwasher. Because it would be so much easier
if Mom emptied the dishwasher – she knows how and it’s her job because she’s
the mom, after all. Because it would be so much easier if Jesus kept on
teaching and doing miracles – he knows how and it’s his job, right? But maybe
my most important job as a mother was to teach my children to be self-reliant,
and maybe Jesus’ most important job was to equip the disciples to be able to
carry on the work, to share the gospel, to baptize, and even on occasion and
with God’s help, to carry out a miracle or two. And that meant that on occasion Jesus might have to say "why? because I said so."
A
couple of years ago I celebrated one of those big “round-number” birthdays. The
children, all grown up now, asked what I wanted. I said that I wanted them to
come down to Richmond and gather and cook me a meal, after all the meals I had
served them over the years.
Now,
friends, you need to know that the two eldest boys – they’re men, not boys, to
be accurate – are the cooks for their families. Each is married and has two
kids, and they love to cook, and they do it well. The next son also cooks
brilliantly – and he runs the cocktail program at a high-end San Francisco
restaurant – we used to call it being a bartender, but now it’s “running the
cocktail program” since he invents all sorts of amazing drinks, including the
Steph Curry, which is definitely a slam dunk. The next son is a fine cook as
well, as his girlfriend will attest, and my daughter can more than hold her own
in any kitchen anywhere, particularly when it comes to baked goods. The
housekeeping education didn’t stick, but my goodness, the cooking lessons
sparked a lifetime love of cooking for them all!
So
when I asked for this gift of their presence and their cooking, what ensued was
pretty similar to the planning of the D-Day invasion. Emails flew back and
forth to decide on the menu and who would cook what- some trash talking about the
others’ skill level as well, since nothing ever changes when it comes to
sibling interactions – and eventually they came up with a plan for a feast
beyond compare. They knew they needed to make food that not only showed off
their skills, but was something the grandchildren would eat, and that would accommodate
various allergies, food restrictions, and such. Matt would make a pasta dish, Chris would
grill a spiced pork loin, Bryce would do apps, Sam would serve as sous-chef and
salad maker, and Allie would help my husband with the dessert and “other duties
as assigned.” My daughters-in-law and I hid out in the living room as every
bowl, every utensil, every pot and every square inch of the kitchen was put to
use. Occasionally one of the troops would come in to say “have you got any____?”
I’d tell them where to find it – they had sent a shopping list to my husband
for most of what they needed but they knew I would have basics already in the
house.
For
several hours they occupied the kitchen, and I do mean “occupied,” and at the
end of it all we gathered around the dining room table for an amazing meal, made
all the more amazing by storytelling, by laughter, by shared experience, by the
transformative power of lessons learned and possibilities come to fruition.
Late
that night I thought about the wonderful evening, but I also thought about the exhaustion of all the nights I had spent
with the kids as they were growing up, saying “you need to figure out how to do
this stuff, since I won’t always be there to clean up after you,” the
push-back, the arguments, the “why do I have to do it?”, the “because I’m the
mom and I said so,” the eventual sullen compliance…
…and
I thought about Jesus, sitting with the disciples, so often probably thinking
to himself “are these folks ever going to get it? Will they be able to carry on
when I am no longer with them?”
…and
now I think about Jesus, having this conversation with them at the Last Supper
immediately before his betrayal and death, and Judas, not Iscariot, saying “why
do WE have to do it?”
…and
I think of his gentle answer, when he says in essence, “I’ll still be with you,
even if I am not with you physically. You will carry the lessons you’ve learned
from me. It’s not really that hard and I know you can do it. Just keep on
keeping my word, and you will be blessed and be a blessing.”
I
expect for many of you, worry about the future looms large. The arrival of
Padre Lee has been delayed by government paperwork – bureaucracy! – and it’s
been a long time. When is he going to get here permanently? When will we have
our ordained leader once and for all? But this reading from the Gospel of John
is a wise reminder – it’s not about the leader, because you all have the
capacity to be faithful leaders. You have learned from Jesus and from all the priests who have served you over the years. You all
have pulled together to be the church, because the church is all of you. Those
of us with the collars, we have a specific role to play in the life and worship
of the church. Priests come and priests go, but the church is the people, not
just the priest.
‘Do
not let your hearts be troubled’ because you already are being church in so
many of the ways that really count. Trust that Jesus is with you, that the Holy
Spirit continues to inform and guide the work of God’s faithful people in this
place.
You
are meant to lead right now, and you are leading. Why do we have to? Because
Jesus is the Lord, and he says so.
Amen.
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1 comment:
Please tell me that someday you'll publish a little book with these sermons in it! Thank you :)
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