tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14608528.post112725061816074439..comments2023-10-23T14:31:20.331-04:00Comments on Rev Mibi: Continuing on the Pathmibi52/ The Rev. Dr. Mary Brennan Thorpehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02129758906278501568noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14608528.post-1127317078555535442005-09-21T11:37:00.000-04:002005-09-21T11:37:00.000-04:00It seems to me that a little welling up shows empa...It seems to me that a little welling up shows empathy--breaking down and sobbing probably crosses a line.<BR/><BR/>When I did CPE I found that I needed to do some kind of ritual to let things/people go before going on to the next thing. A prayer where I actually imaged placing the person into God's arms. (i.e. so I'm not responsible for holding him/her anymore) It's hard. I learned it the hard way though, during my internship when a homeless woman came in and poured her heart out to me. I directed her to some help, and she left relieved and grateful. The next day I had these flu-like symptoms. I don't want to get too woo-woo about it but I do think all that stress and heartbreak went into me. She left feeling better, I left with all her grief still lurking in my body. That's when I realized that I needed to give it to God.<BR/><BR/>Just my experience.reverendmotherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07457532866087494676noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14608528.post-1127315781363740192005-09-21T11:16:00.000-04:002005-09-21T11:16:00.000-04:00Mibi,I've often wondered the same thing about keep...Mibi,<BR/><BR/>I've often wondered the same thing about keeping my emotions in check.<BR/><BR/>I used to be a volunteer patient advocate in an inner city trauma center. I LOVED my work there. I found that car accidents, stabbings/shootings, psych patients, other traumatic injuries, heart attacks, terminally ill patients, etc. were all situations that I could deal with while keeping myself together. However, I had a harder time restraining my emotions in situations involving rapes, domestic violence, suicide, injuries to firefighters or police, and anything dealing with children.<BR/><BR/>And then there was always the need to keep that balance between compassion and distance. I knew that if I became too distraught after talking with a young woman who had been injured by her boyfriend I would be no good to the man dying of cancer in the next room. I prayed. Hard. Often. <BR/><BR/>One of the things about ER work was that I never knew what became of people. I feel like that made things much easier for me. I worry about how to keep it together when dealing with people who I have an ongoing relationship with. I worry about not only their funerals but also their weddings, confirmations, and baptisms. Rites of passage make me weepy.<BR/><BR/>I guess we will learn as we go...Sophiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02066521392849698323noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14608528.post-1127264675827651262005-09-20T21:04:00.000-04:002005-09-20T21:04:00.000-04:00Well, pastoral care is not about you, but CPE is. ...Well, pastoral care is not about you, but CPE is. It's about learning to know what situations and dynamics are your personal Chinese Finger Traps. They won't stop affecting you, but you'll know what they are. And CPE is also about cultivating a pastoral presence, figuring out what your persona as pastoral caregiver will be, how you will represent God. When you go out to serve a church, you will also go into it knowing that you have to be in a different relationship with the people than in your current church. It's all a process.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08235049965406944684noreply@blogger.com